About Arizona...

You know how talking about the weather, is cliche' for shallow and boring?

Well...there's nothing shallow or boring about this weather. It's apocalyptic. I live in Arizona where we are breaking all of our records right now for the most days over 110.  We reached 119 MULTIPLE times this week. Right now it is only 108. Did you hear that? ONLY 108. We were outside a little bit ago and thought it felt "pretty nice." There is something wrong with us.

There's probably a million reasons we should not be here. Like, we might actually be outside God's will here in our little Tower of Babel air-conditioned fifth-largest city in the US. Remember that part of the Hunger Game movies where the game makers would create natural disasters to try to move the tributes to different parts of the arena? I wonder if he's like, "How hot do I have to make it to get you guys to leave?" This was created for snakes and scorpions.

But here's the thing about us Arizonan's...we complain...but we're also secretly proud of just how tough we are...

If we moved...

Our weather wouldn't be nearly as impressive. There's just something so "mid" about highs in the 90's. I mean...be in the 70's and you get bragging rights for how beautiful it is. But you get to 90 and you're just "junior hot." Not great. But nothing to write home about. We're also proud that we have these survival skills people who have not experienced face-melting sun just don't know. Do not walk outside barefoot. Stay indoors from at least 9 a.m.-5 p.m. Never leave the house without water. Don't leave anything outside...the sun will destroy it. DO NOT GO HIKIING. Daniel was in Florida with high schoolers from around the country last month. It was pretty stinky, miserable hot. But he said the Arizona kids fared the best. During the outdoor activities, other groups would need a break to sit...they just kept going. Humidity's bad, but there's just nothing like 120. Bragging rights.

If we moved...

We'd need new "scary critters" stories. A couple years ago the boys were fishing with grandpa. Part of the way down the path they heard this un-real sound, like nothing they'd ever heard. Right in their path was a coiled up rattle snake, that lifted it's neck (is it a neck?) high into the air facing right at them, and gave his warning. I am pretty sure Moses hasn't been to a river to go fishing since. But it was a story that will be told forever and ever. We go to church with a firefighter who has dozens of "great" snake stories. I had never thought about that aspect of their job before...but it's pretty big!

The scorpions...it's a fun party game here to get a black light and go outside "hunting" scoprions. I'm not kidding. It's what we all do for fun. I hate scorpions. I'm terrified of them. But, I've killed enough of them now that I laugh at "once upon a time" when I used to be scared of harmless spiders and crickets.

Coyotes are a regular part of the mix now too. I see them probably at least once a month...and not out on Bush highway or in a state park...more like the Target parking lot and my kids' school neighborhood. Every once in awhile it gets real exciting and we get javelinas. 

If we moved, we would no longer have any pictures of coyotes, javelinas, scorpions, and diamond back rattlesnakes to post on social media. 

If we moved...

We wouldn't have Red Mountain, my most favorite view in maybe all the world. We couldn't see the different colors and shapes it takes at different times of day and from different angles. How would I know when I'm almost home/

We wouldn't have saguaros. This might be one of the most clever things God's ever designed. 

We wouldn't have prickly pear all-the things...It's like the pumpkin spice latte of summer here. Prickly pear jam, prickly pear lemonade, prickly pear ice tea, prickly pear candy.

We might end up living in a place that thinks that ground beef and velveta cheese belong in a Mexican food restaurant. We may end up somewhere that's never heard of birria, or el pastor street tacos, tres leches cake, jamiaca, and horchata. We might end up somewhere that thinks roasted green chilis are "too spicy" (which they are not at all), or has never wrapped a hot dog in bacon and served it with pinto beans. Someone who's obviously never been to Tucson.

If we moved...

We might need to learn how to shovel snow or drive on ice.

We might need to learn about hurricanes and tornadoes. 

Or roads that don't go on a North/South and East/West grid. 

Guys...this is the worst right now. Like seriously the worst. But, we're pretty tough down here. Must be from eating all that cactus and fried rattlesnake.