This is Thanksgiving

 "The Lord Jesus, on the night he was betrayed, took the bread, and when he had given thanks, he broke it and said, 'This is my body which is given for you; do this in remembrance of me.'" 

I Corinthians 11:23-24.

Our dear Lord, Jesus. On the night he was betrayed. Gave thanks. 

I had never thought about this verse in such a way before reading Ann Voskamp's 1,000 Gifts. And this verse might mean more this Thanksgiving for many of us than it ever has before.

I preface this by saying that none of us will ever experience the kind of betrayal that Jesus faced that night. We'll never know because he loves us too much to let us experience what he went through in the garden of Gethsemane, at the home of Caiphus, or standing before the angry mob in Pilate's courtyard- the creation set on destroying its creator and ignorantly shouting "Give us Barabbas!"

Our betrayals are much smaller than that. But they hurt none the less. And who among us hasn't felt some sort of betrayal in 2020? We've felt betrayed by our communities. Instead of rallying together we fought each other for toilet paper and Lysol wipes. Those we've respected have dismissed the cries for social justice and reform. Political parties we'd been affiliated with our whole lives have gone off the rails. The companies we've worked hard for didn't bat an eye as they handed us pink slips. Our own bodies betrayed us, as we took all the vitamins, followed all the guidelines and still ended up devastatingly sick. We've felt betrayed by those closest to us. We realized that many of those who we thought were willing to die for us wouldn't have even crossed the road to save us.

Maybe some of us even feel betrayed by God himself. As we prepare for a Thanksgiving that is opposite of everything we've ever known Thanksgiving to be about, it's hard not to feel mad. Mad that "the more the merrier" isn't currently an appropriate way to show love. Mad about cancelled travel plans, and unused airplane tickets. Mad that we're not spending hours dodging sisters, nephews, aunts and dogs in the kitchen or laughing at the way dad and brother snore the same, asleep next to each other on the couch, "watching" football. Mad that we have to eat six feet apart. And when there's no one to blame because it "is what it is", who do we blame? God? 

There. Did I hit all the bases? Did we get it all out of our systems?

Sure we've been disappointed. Disillusioned. Let Down. Betrayed. And yet we still choose thanksgiving. And still we know that God is good. In fact, this might be the most important Thanksgiving celebration of our lives. Why?

1. There is always SOMETHING to be Thankful for. 

I've shared before that I read Ann Voskamp's book during the hardest time of my life. I was skeptical of it all at first. It seemed easy for Ann to be Thankful. She was skinny and beautiful, she lives on a farm and bakes homemade bread and writes Hallmark greeting cards. I think she has chickens. But as I set out to make my list of 1,000 things I was thankful for, suddenly instead of focusing on "Why does my kid have cancer?" I was noticing the pretty view from our room, the perfectly formed foam heart in my latte, the way the sky turned pink on our way to drop Daniel off at school and the family of quail in our backyard. As Ann says, "when I give thanks for the seemingly microscopic, I make a place for God to grow within me." We've got to start somewhere. Grab a pen and a notebook. Can you get to 20? 100? 1000? Even in 2020?

I'll start- I'm thankful that I scored a Costco package of toilet paper a few days ago. Yes, I said it. I've never appreciated toilet paper more in my life. 

I had time to put up my Christmas decorations without it feeling stressful. It wasn't shoved between multiple extended family events, children's program rehearsal, and a six week crash course in Western Civilization like it was last year. 

I'm thankful for zoom, and Facebook (sometimes), and Instacart. 

2. Thankfulness changes us. Our brain is a muscle, and the parts of it we exercise are the parts that grow stronger. When we practice negativity, we get even better at negativity. When we practice noticing God's gifts, we become the type of people that see his gifts everywhere we look. This doesn't mean we're not honest or ignore the necessary work of restoration. But it does mean we remember we're owed nothing, and all that is good is a gift. 

And, gratitude itself becomes the gift. An interesting article in U.S.A. Today cites multiple studies which suggest "Expressing gratitude improves cardiovascular strength, sleep quality and more" (Hauck).  People who "regularly exercise gratitude have the ability to regulate emotions in constructive ways. It can even short circuit the body's stress response." I fee like that's a gift we could all benefit from right about now.

Ann has said, "Eucharisteo-thanksgiving-always proceeds the miracle." I love this. But, it's not some mystic or prosperity-gospel recipe for coaxing God into doing what we want. The miracles aren't always visible or material. The miracle is the sanctifying work of the Holy Spirit to shape and form us into the image of God. The spiritual discipline of consciously choosing gratefulness is a tool used in this process.

3. "And we know that all things work together for the good of those who love God who are called according to his purposes." Romans 8:28

I don't believe in a definition of predestination that's quite the same as that of my Reformed-theology/Calvinist brothers and sisters in Christ. But, I do believe God has a long history of using broken things in beautiful ways. When I choose to notice, I realize the beautiful things that have come out of 2020 for me personally. The time I've had to rest, reflect and to spend time with my husband and our boys is priceless. We've all been handed a blank slate in many regards and a chance to re-write and re-imagine how we've always done things. What a tragedy to have wasted all of this nutrient rich manure. It's time to grow some flowers.

4. Even if-He is good. 

Betsy ten Boom, a woman sent to a Nazi death camp for hiding Jewish people during WWII, took time to thank God for the fleas that kept the Nazis outside. Paul and Silas had a midnight praise and worship service in a Greek prison. And...on the night he was betrayed...Jesus gave thanks. 

Even if we feel betrayed. Even if we have to "Do Thanksgiving" over zoom. Even if it's so much worse than that. So worse that we're not even ready to speak the words of how awful it all is. Even if everything feels wrong and the world is falling apart. God is love, God is good, and we can trust him. Even if we can't see it from where we're standing in space and time, he is at work as He has been throughout history, setting all things right again.